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Chat up lines... that don't work!

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AC
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Chat up lines... that don't work!

Post by AC »

'ey up Ladies and Gents,

Just a quickie thread on chat-up lines, should be good for a giggle!

Gents: What's the worst/most ill-recieved chat-up line you've ever used?

Ladies (I know there are a few of you around here!): What's the worst chat-up line you've ever heard?

Lads, judging by the reaction of the young lady whom my interests were focussed upon tonight, never, ever try the old "I'd like to shunt you like a freight train" line no matter how pissed you are!
:drinking:
If it doesn't hurt it's not worth doing!
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Frank S.
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Post by Frank S. »

"Do you want to see something swell?"
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Artist
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Post by Artist »

What do you do in your spare time love, cross yer legs!?

I'm a helicopter pilot.

Do you enjoy the thrill of sex with a stranger?

And the all time classic said by a Bootneck to a rather rotund, less than visually perfect Lady in Guz once.

"Most of the blokes reckon your a right ugly fat cow but I'm willing to let it pass, OK?" (she gave him a right kicking!)

Artist
Last edited by Artist on Sun 28 Mar, 2004 8:59 am, edited 1 time in total.
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BenChug
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Post by BenChug »

Lick your finger then touch them with said finger and say "Lets get you out of those wet clothes."

And my personal favorite "You really look hot while I'm drunk."
If a man has nothing he is willing to die for then he isn't fit to live.
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always go commando
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Post by always go commando »

does this smell like chloroform?

can i stand here?

your mate won't shag me will you?

do you come here ofter? no? do you want to?

alright love, ya know i've got a thing for fat birds.

the best chat up line ever is "can you imagine if a panda walked in to this room with a knife and the.... walked back out" don't ask, but it got a reaction, and thats all i was looking for.
stuck in a rut, unsure about the future, unsure about the military lifestyle, for a while anyway
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I love beasting
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Post by I love beasting »

Walk up to a girl at the bar..."do you want me to go down"
Uni in Sepember
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HavocIRL
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Post by HavocIRL »

Walk over and look her up and down 3 times from head to toe then say "Nice shoes, wanna f@#k?"
Spray and pray.
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El Prez
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Post by El Prez »

For a fat bird you don't sweat much do you.
You should talk to somebody who gives a f**k.
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Henke
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Post by Henke »

Beckon them towards you with your finger..

When they come over you say, 'I knew that if i fingered you long enough you'd come!' :D

As a boxer, the best chat up line ever is to say that you've got a fight coming up and can't have sex for 2 weeks. Guaranteed to work everytime!
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lew
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Post by lew »

Most cringe making one I cant think of is...

Is that a ladder in your tights or a stair way to heaven...

Heard this used by my friend and it actually worked :o ... I’ve got a really small penis but am egar to please :lol:

Can I buy you a drink or give you the money for that one...


lew
All I want in life is a cold beer, a fast car, a big F**King gun and a hot woman to fetch the beer, and clean the car! is that really to much to ask? - Quotes by a redneck.com

recruit test 21 march - PASSED
medical 30 march - PASSED
interview 30 march - PASSED
PJFT - 11 april - PASSED 9:18
PRMC - 7th - 10th JUNE. PASSED
foundation - 29th August
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Post by Tab »

You have dropped some thing, well never mind the flies or already on it.

:drinking: :drinking: :drinking: :drinking: :drinking: :drinking: :drinking: :drinking: :drinking: :drinking: :drinking:
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rambo
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Post by rambo »

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

reaction: ahh thats cute

And landed on your face!!
Listen in men give 100% or i will thrash you till your eyes bleed!

God is airborne because he failed his commando course!
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ashley
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Post by ashley »

Stare and say "...it's not going to suck itself."
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got1
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Post by got1 »

" Lie down I think I love you."
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Andy O'Pray
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Post by Andy O'Pray »

Come and get me, I'm full of babies.

Really smooth Royal.

Aye - Andy. :lol:
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