Hello Flo,
thanx for the welcome! yeah i agree they are a good bunch! Not been on much myself either which is a pitty! Im actually doing my training in Lanarkshire which is just outside Glasgow. Hope you are all well.
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im new!!
Dammit, missed her again! What is going on? You work hard, train hard, recruit from the bottom of the barrel and do you get staff loyalty? Do you hell. Just moans and groans about life up North, how the bloke is away and he's missed. Well here at the "Depths o' Despair" clinic for the haggard we excel in working under harsh conditions.
The lighting has improved in theatre, since we moved the stirrups and workmate under the street lamp; and the suction on my old hoover is nothing compared to this new Dyson.
Complaints are dealt with in a desultory way by the pub landlord, who is on a retainer, but why he should be carried around by him is beyond me. Must go, I can hear the wail of sirens, and as the firefolk are striking, it must be the police, because ambulances don't rush to get here.
The lighting has improved in theatre, since we moved the stirrups and workmate under the street lamp; and the suction on my old hoover is nothing compared to this new Dyson.
Complaints are dealt with in a desultory way by the pub landlord, who is on a retainer, but why he should be carried around by him is beyond me. Must go, I can hear the wail of sirens, and as the firefolk are striking, it must be the police, because ambulances don't rush to get here.
You should talk to somebody who gives a f**k.
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v77/Robiz/movie_star_wars_yoda.gif[/img]
El Presidente
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v77/Robiz/movie_star_wars_yoda.gif[/img]
El Presidente
Tara, for the love of Mike, don't go there in a month with a T in it. T'March is freezing, the burn will be frozen over, chips willnae cook in cooling fat, and children will freeze to the spot as they adapt to a European Union initiative advising them to urinate in the street in the French fashion, if they feel the necessity.
Of course your wee man will be away then, so if I may offer my services as guide, cognoscenti and liberator of marbled limbs please feel free to ask. After all .............shhhhhhhhhhhhh Nurse approaches, I hear the jangling of her hosiery, must oil her limbs, it's this continual rain you know, plays havoc with her hinges.
Of course your wee man will be away then, so if I may offer my services as guide, cognoscenti and liberator of marbled limbs please feel free to ask. After all .............shhhhhhhhhhhhh Nurse approaches, I hear the jangling of her hosiery, must oil her limbs, it's this continual rain you know, plays havoc with her hinges.
You should talk to somebody who gives a f**k.
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v77/Robiz/movie_star_wars_yoda.gif[/img]
El Presidente
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v77/Robiz/movie_star_wars_yoda.gif[/img]
El Presidente
Wishy, can't you hear the music.............the hueys inbound with gun ports flaring..............the smell of freshly napalmed jocks (I like mine over easy).........pity, but what a way to clean the place up.
You should talk to somebody who gives a f**k.
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v77/Robiz/movie_star_wars_yoda.gif[/img]
El Presidente
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v77/Robiz/movie_star_wars_yoda.gif[/img]
El Presidente
Tara, you'll be delighted to hear that I'm to be published, yes for real; apparently the President of the Royal College of Surgeons was so impressed with my paper on the 'Use of Anaesthesia during Gynaecological Procedures' that he immediately proposed publishing it with his contacts at Metropolitan, which I believe is based at a desirable piece of real estate in Marylebone Road. He has asked me to forward all my notes for use as evidence of, I presume, the quality of my work.
Perhaps I'd better give you an outline of my theory. The patient is placed in the usual stirrup and handcuff position; I'm happy to work in the overhand or underhand manner. Now here's the clever bit, no anaesthetic is given to the patient; I take huge gulps of laughing gas and oxygen. this reduces the risk to my senses and creates a feeling of well being which is immediately transmitted to the patient by the application of a little KY. I can now work with total abandon and may I say a little bit of 'Je ne sait quoi', loosely translated by my solicitor as , 'I don't know what I'm doing'. In this merry state the lighting takes on a whole new aspect, lilac, turquoise, and flashes of vivid light.
On returning from this enlightened state I usually find the patient has fled the scene, dragging the expensive equipment across the surgery/garage floor; and may be found informing a member of the local constabulary about my innovative methods.
I hope to be interviewed by the literary editor of the Guardian, once my solicitor has bailed me from Truro nick. My offer of unpaid local acting employment remains in force, at least until the lucre starts rolling in and I can return to Amsterdam, my main source of staff.
Perhaps I'd better give you an outline of my theory. The patient is placed in the usual stirrup and handcuff position; I'm happy to work in the overhand or underhand manner. Now here's the clever bit, no anaesthetic is given to the patient; I take huge gulps of laughing gas and oxygen. this reduces the risk to my senses and creates a feeling of well being which is immediately transmitted to the patient by the application of a little KY. I can now work with total abandon and may I say a little bit of 'Je ne sait quoi', loosely translated by my solicitor as , 'I don't know what I'm doing'. In this merry state the lighting takes on a whole new aspect, lilac, turquoise, and flashes of vivid light.
On returning from this enlightened state I usually find the patient has fled the scene, dragging the expensive equipment across the surgery/garage floor; and may be found informing a member of the local constabulary about my innovative methods.
I hope to be interviewed by the literary editor of the Guardian, once my solicitor has bailed me from Truro nick. My offer of unpaid local acting employment remains in force, at least until the lucre starts rolling in and I can return to Amsterdam, my main source of staff.
You should talk to somebody who gives a f**k.
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v77/Robiz/movie_star_wars_yoda.gif[/img]
El Presidente
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v77/Robiz/movie_star_wars_yoda.gif[/img]
El Presidente
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North Sea Tigress
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- Posts: 335
- Joined: Sun 16 Jun, 2002 9:49 pm
- Location: Bonnie Scotland/Southern North Sea
Hi Tara, warm welcome. As you have seen, most people on here are a bit mad (standfast Parry, he's positivley barking!!) I have not been around as much as usual, as I have been a little busy getting married and moving into a new house. I am a nurse working offshore and living in West Lothian, not too far from your gaff, so we should meet for beer!! I know madwives like their tipple! 
Rob, I'm not sure I like that insinuation about Jocks being over easy!! Loz ands I may resemble that remark!!!
Have fun Tara
Rob, I'm not sure I like that insinuation about Jocks being over easy!! Loz ands I may resemble that remark!!!
Have fun Tara
God made Royal Marines, to provide QARNNS with playthings
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North Sea Tigress
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- Posts: 335
- Joined: Sun 16 Jun, 2002 9:49 pm
- Location: Bonnie Scotland/Southern North Sea
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Rogue Chef
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Rogue Chef
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Rogue Chef
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Ahoy there Loz!
I know what you mean.
When I was about 9ish (1968ish) we lived up that way. My Dad took me to Spean Bridge. The effect was profound. I told him "I'm going to be one of those".
Years later at the Army/Navy Careers office the Matelot CPO asked me why I wanted to join the RM. I told him the story. He didn't get it.
P.S. I think I may have served with your hoppy (first name Steve?)
I know what you mean.
When I was about 9ish (1968ish) we lived up that way. My Dad took me to Spean Bridge. The effect was profound. I told him "I'm going to be one of those".
Years later at the Army/Navy Careers office the Matelot CPO asked me why I wanted to join the RM. I told him the story. He didn't get it.
P.S. I think I may have served with your hoppy (first name Steve?)
