Loz,
call me on my mobile and check your Margarets,
Berty
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post traumatic stress disorder
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harry hackedoff
- Member
- Posts: 14415
- Joined: Tue 19 Feb, 2002 12:00 am
Hello.
Ratso and others may find this book of interest.
It helped me and encourages you to think whilst reading it?
"OVERCOMING TRAUMATIC STRESS"
Written by Herbert and wetmore
Published by Robinsons of London
Its available online at places like amazon Or you can order it from any good book store.
I certainly recommend it, but dont read it before you go to sleep..
If you find it gets to much? break it done to a few pages at a time.
Addenbrookes hospital recommended it to me.....
Mike where in France? Im in the Dordogne/loire valley as from wednesday? 2 weeks+
...
Best wishes to everyone
Simon
Ratso and others may find this book of interest.
It helped me and encourages you to think whilst reading it?
"OVERCOMING TRAUMATIC STRESS"
Written by Herbert and wetmore
Published by Robinsons of London
Its available online at places like amazon Or you can order it from any good book store.
I certainly recommend it, but dont read it before you go to sleep..
If you find it gets to much? break it done to a few pages at a time.
Addenbrookes hospital recommended it to me.....
Mike where in France? Im in the Dordogne/loire valley as from wednesday? 2 weeks+
...Best wishes to everyone
Simon
-
harry hackedoff
- Member
- Posts: 14415
- Joined: Tue 19 Feb, 2002 12:00 am
Lorraine, thank you.
I, too, cried over "Escape to victory" but only because of the abbysmal plot
Gents, I suggested to Lozhop that she downloaded my file to show to her family friend next weekend when she heads north to top up on the "Wee Heavy".
I must confess that I had an ulterior motive for which I appologise, Loz.
I knew , as regular visitors to this thread all do, something of Loz`s history. I allso knew that she wouldn`t download the file for herself.Our telephone conversation about her friend, and the advice I gave, were genuine. But I knew that if she did download, there was plenty in there which would benefit her.
I know that this thread has a lot of silent "visitors" besides the regular bunch of post-ers. To all of you, please take a look. And as mentioned to you before, me talking to you or giving advice is one thing, but it is second-hand gen. Talk to someone who specialises.
Most importantly, talk.
as ever,
yours, Aye
Harry Hackedoff
I, too, cried over "Escape to victory" but only because of the abbysmal plot
Gents, I suggested to Lozhop that she downloaded my file to show to her family friend next weekend when she heads north to top up on the "Wee Heavy".
I must confess that I had an ulterior motive for which I appologise, Loz.
I knew , as regular visitors to this thread all do, something of Loz`s history. I allso knew that she wouldn`t download the file for herself.Our telephone conversation about her friend, and the advice I gave, were genuine. But I knew that if she did download, there was plenty in there which would benefit her.
I know that this thread has a lot of silent "visitors" besides the regular bunch of post-ers. To all of you, please take a look. And as mentioned to you before, me talking to you or giving advice is one thing, but it is second-hand gen. Talk to someone who specialises.
Most importantly, talk.
as ever,
yours, Aye
Harry Hackedoff
One thing I am finding out is that there is a lot of understanding from a lot of people for what we all go through.
One source which I am sure many younger members of this board, me included (yes I am! well in the brain department anyway!), is the Association. The members are a good sounding board, remember many of them served in worse conditions than we could ever imaging.
So my advice is to take the time to pay a visit, you will get a good pint if nothing else.
One source which I am sure many younger members of this board, me included (yes I am! well in the brain department anyway!), is the Association. The members are a good sounding board, remember many of them served in worse conditions than we could ever imaging.
So my advice is to take the time to pay a visit, you will get a good pint if nothing else.
Falklands Veterans Foundation
www.fvf.org.uk www.yomp30.co.uk
Save the Fearless www.hmsfearless.co.uk
Give Her A Home So We Can All Remember
www.fvf.org.uk www.yomp30.co.uk
Save the Fearless www.hmsfearless.co.uk
Give Her A Home So We Can All Remember
P.T.S.D.
Gentlemen,
I have been one of the 'silent Visitors' that H mentions and have read every thread on this subject many times.
I felt that as a comparitivly new guy on the block, that I would be best not to contribute. However here goes.
There but for the grace of God go I, although I will, luckily, never know what you have/are going though but being and exbootie I can perhaps have a small idea.
2 years ago I went through a breakdown due to a sucession of family events, I too, thought that it was only my problem, that I should not, would not TROUBLE anyone else with my problems, and infact they would not want to know anyway. This went on for some while, how wrong I was, when I eventually cracked, I then found that there was an army of help and love out there, form the most unexpected sources
I mention this not for sympathy as I no longer need it nor deserve it, you guys need the reassurance that things can and will get better and as Loz and a miriad of others say, TALKING is by far the best medicine.
Anyone reading these threads can only but be effected in a positive way.
Finally, Keep talking, If you want a cry, do so, you will feel better for it and IF you have a god, may he or she be with you.
Aye
I have been one of the 'silent Visitors' that H mentions and have read every thread on this subject many times.
I felt that as a comparitivly new guy on the block, that I would be best not to contribute. However here goes.
There but for the grace of God go I, although I will, luckily, never know what you have/are going though but being and exbootie I can perhaps have a small idea.
2 years ago I went through a breakdown due to a sucession of family events, I too, thought that it was only my problem, that I should not, would not TROUBLE anyone else with my problems, and infact they would not want to know anyway. This went on for some while, how wrong I was, when I eventually cracked, I then found that there was an army of help and love out there, form the most unexpected sources
I mention this not for sympathy as I no longer need it nor deserve it, you guys need the reassurance that things can and will get better and as Loz and a miriad of others say, TALKING is by far the best medicine.
Anyone reading these threads can only but be effected in a positive way.
Finally, Keep talking, If you want a cry, do so, you will feel better for it and IF you have a god, may he or she be with you.
Aye
The Honourable Lord Mike of Loch Borralan
.........................Because I AM Worth IT..xxxx.......Never Mistake Motion for Action
.........................Because I AM Worth IT..xxxx.......Never Mistake Motion for Action
I had the privilage to talk to one of the Falkland widows who lost her husband and a father on F4. I will never ever forget the emotion that I felt during a ten minute call. I can only say that the feelings of someone that can touch you that way are immense.
The facts are that there is no structure in place for families and the no care attitude is frighteningly indifferent when it comes to even reunions. This lady had been left off the list for the Foxtrot Juliet commemoration for the last twenty years, yes they have done this every year.
To be turned away from a forces base where you want to lay flowers at a memorial is another sting in the face, then to have never evre seen a death certificate means that the final act has yet to be played out.
I hope that you will understand why I feel so strongly that this lady and her three children should be helped to visit the Falklands by us as a final act of our gratitude.
As she told me it took fifteen years before she could grieve properly, I guess that it is hard to close the door when you have not been able to say good bye properly.
I hope you will all with me wish all families our best wishes during what must be a very trying and emmotional time.
The facts are that there is no structure in place for families and the no care attitude is frighteningly indifferent when it comes to even reunions. This lady had been left off the list for the Foxtrot Juliet commemoration for the last twenty years, yes they have done this every year.
To be turned away from a forces base where you want to lay flowers at a memorial is another sting in the face, then to have never evre seen a death certificate means that the final act has yet to be played out.
I hope that you will understand why I feel so strongly that this lady and her three children should be helped to visit the Falklands by us as a final act of our gratitude.
As she told me it took fifteen years before she could grieve properly, I guess that it is hard to close the door when you have not been able to say good bye properly.
I hope you will all with me wish all families our best wishes during what must be a very trying and emmotional time.
Falklands Veterans Foundation
www.fvf.org.uk www.yomp30.co.uk
Save the Fearless www.hmsfearless.co.uk
Give Her A Home So We Can All Remember
www.fvf.org.uk www.yomp30.co.uk
Save the Fearless www.hmsfearless.co.uk
Give Her A Home So We Can All Remember
-
harry hackedoff
- Member
- Posts: 14415
- Joined: Tue 19 Feb, 2002 12:00 am
-
thegreyman
- Member
- Posts: 8
- Joined: Wed 05 Jun, 2002 12:48 am
- Location: Derbyshire
post traumatic stress disorder
Hi Guys,
This is my first posting to the group.
I served with Royal for 22 years leaving just 18 months ago.
I served in the Falklands with 45 CDO Gp RM (I know Yorky Malone quite well - different troop).
20 years seems a long time ago but time doesn't heal the pain. I have a wonderful wife and son. I live in a reasonable house and have few worries. I have been trying to study to requalify for a new career, but despite gaining 10 O'Levels (GCSE's) and 3 A'Levels prior to joining Royal, I simply cannot concentrate! I suffer head aches and get depressed over the simplest problem. I wake up at 2 or 3 am for no reason. I go on drinking binges which last for weeks, not getting intoxicated but simply drinking to null my senses. I'll then stop and not touch a drop for six or eight weeks!
Two weeks ago, after a minor argument with my wife, which should never have occurred, I got up from my PC, went into the bathroom, and took for sleeping pills which had been there for years. I followed them up with 10 soluble aspirin. I then went down to my garden shed, made myself comfortable with the radio playing classic FM and an easy chair, 10 pints of water and I took 68 soluble Kapake (an extremely strong mixture of codine and paracetamol) and 20 soluble paracetamol!
I wrote my suicide note and relaxed waiting for the sleepers to knock me out before the other drugs kicked in.
Unfortunatly I began to vomit (and swallowed my sick making me heave, thus inducing move vomiting and the shits). My kidneys began to function after 12 hours but don't know what damage I've done to my liver.
That was two weeks ago.
I have not mentioned this to my wife or son and still think of alternative methods of taking my life. (If only I had kept the 9mm Browning instead of ditching it over the side of Canberra).
Upon leaving the Marines, the memories were so painful that I refused a Top Table and leaving gift from the SNCO mess and department and have not make contact with any of my ex-comrades.
I have never sought help, although I realise that I have serious PTSD symptoms after NI and the Falklands.
Can anyone please give my some help, before me wife becomes a widdow and my 13 year old son fatherless.
This is my first posting to the group.
I served with Royal for 22 years leaving just 18 months ago.
I served in the Falklands with 45 CDO Gp RM (I know Yorky Malone quite well - different troop).
20 years seems a long time ago but time doesn't heal the pain. I have a wonderful wife and son. I live in a reasonable house and have few worries. I have been trying to study to requalify for a new career, but despite gaining 10 O'Levels (GCSE's) and 3 A'Levels prior to joining Royal, I simply cannot concentrate! I suffer head aches and get depressed over the simplest problem. I wake up at 2 or 3 am for no reason. I go on drinking binges which last for weeks, not getting intoxicated but simply drinking to null my senses. I'll then stop and not touch a drop for six or eight weeks!
Two weeks ago, after a minor argument with my wife, which should never have occurred, I got up from my PC, went into the bathroom, and took for sleeping pills which had been there for years. I followed them up with 10 soluble aspirin. I then went down to my garden shed, made myself comfortable with the radio playing classic FM and an easy chair, 10 pints of water and I took 68 soluble Kapake (an extremely strong mixture of codine and paracetamol) and 20 soluble paracetamol!
I wrote my suicide note and relaxed waiting for the sleepers to knock me out before the other drugs kicked in.
Unfortunatly I began to vomit (and swallowed my sick making me heave, thus inducing move vomiting and the shits). My kidneys began to function after 12 hours but don't know what damage I've done to my liver.
That was two weeks ago.
I have not mentioned this to my wife or son and still think of alternative methods of taking my life. (If only I had kept the 9mm Browning instead of ditching it over the side of Canberra).
Upon leaving the Marines, the memories were so painful that I refused a Top Table and leaving gift from the SNCO mess and department and have not make contact with any of my ex-comrades.
I have never sought help, although I realise that I have serious PTSD symptoms after NI and the Falklands.
Can anyone please give my some help, before me wife becomes a widdow and my 13 year old son fatherless.
Grey Man,
After reading your moving account, I had to go out for a walk before I could reply. "You have touched the thing with a needle"
You have taken a couple of giant leaps forward, don't stop now.
1. You have admitted to yourself that there is something wrong.
2. You have shared your problem with us all.
I won't be a granny, I know you will already have read through this thread, so you will already know what you next small step should be, find someone to talk too.
I know (personally) us ruffy tuffies are uncomfortable at the thought of going to a Doc, for any number of reasons, to discuss what we misconstrue as personal problems. But PLEASE remember, you have an illness, and that illness needs treatment, by someone whether its a Doc or an oppo (old or new).
In the Corps we all had oppo's we could trust and share our experiences with. It still hasn't changed only now you have many more oppo's through this site, through the RBL, through SSAFA, and many, many more.
You are a casualty, don't become a fatality, YOU and your family deserve more - Live so that you might Live.
Check your Tony's,
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
After reading your moving account, I had to go out for a walk before I could reply. "You have touched the thing with a needle"
You have taken a couple of giant leaps forward, don't stop now.
1. You have admitted to yourself that there is something wrong.
2. You have shared your problem with us all.
I won't be a granny, I know you will already have read through this thread, so you will already know what you next small step should be, find someone to talk too.
I know (personally) us ruffy tuffies are uncomfortable at the thought of going to a Doc, for any number of reasons, to discuss what we misconstrue as personal problems. But PLEASE remember, you have an illness, and that illness needs treatment, by someone whether its a Doc or an oppo (old or new).
In the Corps we all had oppo's we could trust and share our experiences with. It still hasn't changed only now you have many more oppo's through this site, through the RBL, through SSAFA, and many, many more.
You are a casualty, don't become a fatality, YOU and your family deserve more - Live so that you might Live.
Check your Tony's,
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
-
harry hackedoff
- Member
- Posts: 14415
- Joined: Tue 19 Feb, 2002 12:00 am
Greyman, you are amonst friends, we are here to listen. Talk to us.
Mutley is right, you have made two vital steps, admitting to yourself that something is wrong and starting to talk. Don`t stop now.
Since you are new on here "Tony" (as in P.M.) means Private Message. Go to Index and at the top click on messages.
I will be on till 0100, if you want a chat.
Well done, mate. Wellcome aboard.
yours, Aye
Harry
Mutley is right, you have made two vital steps, admitting to yourself that something is wrong and starting to talk. Don`t stop now.
Since you are new on here "Tony" (as in P.M.) means Private Message. Go to Index and at the top click on messages.
I will be on till 0100, if you want a chat.
Well done, mate. Wellcome aboard.
yours, Aye
Harry
-
Yorkie Malone
- Member
- Posts: 705
- Joined: Fri 14 Dec, 2001 12:00 am
- Location: Lamerton, Tavistock
Greyman You have read through all the other pages... I hope ... on the PTSD.
I hope that you can see that you are not alone, and the only one.
Yes I had a go at topping myself, twice, failed and carried on.
One of the biggest and bravest things you have done is opened your gob and spoke on here about it.
At last you have admitted that there is something wrong..... AND now want to do something about it.
As above tell the wife, tell her YOU need HER help, get her to make a Doc's appointment .... a double one and the last of the day. Go to that appointment TOGETHER because she will tell the Doc about the "little boy" that she lives with. Cos pound to a pinch you will only tell half the story.
Get in touch withCombat Stress 01372 841680 email wsts@combatstress.org.uk You want the Welfare Officer to come to see you. You want help.
Get your wife to perhaps read this so she can see how that you are not alone and that there are others in the same boat.
Enough of the lecture
Speak I'm in the book and if I'm not there my wife listens as well.
SyY
I hope that you can see that you are not alone, and the only one.
Yes I had a go at topping myself, twice, failed and carried on.
One of the biggest and bravest things you have done is opened your gob and spoke on here about it.
At last you have admitted that there is something wrong..... AND now want to do something about it.
As above tell the wife, tell her YOU need HER help, get her to make a Doc's appointment .... a double one and the last of the day. Go to that appointment TOGETHER because she will tell the Doc about the "little boy" that she lives with. Cos pound to a pinch you will only tell half the story.
Get in touch withCombat Stress 01372 841680 email wsts@combatstress.org.uk You want the Welfare Officer to come to see you. You want help.
Get your wife to perhaps read this so she can see how that you are not alone and that there are others in the same boat.
Enough of the lecture
Speak I'm in the book and if I'm not there my wife listens as well.
SyY
-
Yorkie Malone
- Member
- Posts: 705
- Joined: Fri 14 Dec, 2001 12:00 am
- Location: Lamerton, Tavistock
-
thegreyman
- Member
- Posts: 8
- Joined: Wed 05 Jun, 2002 12:48 am
- Location: Derbyshire
post traumatic stress disorder
Hi Guys,
Thanks for help and support.
I have read what you have said and will seek medical help from my doctor before the week is out. My liver should be all right so long as I do not go on a prolonged drinking binge, it will heal itself. After my little tablet popping session I was in a bad way for attempted to void itself of what was effectively a poison. I had thought of that and tried to dilute the tablets by drinking lots of water. A build of stomach acids as aspirin etc dissolve the stomach lining (thus making it bleed) will cause some vomiting. That has probably saved my kidneys and liver, otherwise I faced 4-6 uncomfortable days in hospital with renal/liver failure. I know because I had a medical book at my side as I took the tablets! A textbook to make sure I was doing ‘as per the book’ and a suicide note to say goodbye.
I have talked to my brother and wife’s aunty about my attempt to take my own life, and I realise that I need to sit down and talk to my wife. Unfortunately, she has taking a break with her parents for 5 days and I am alone with our son. You may imagine living with someone who is essentially deeply depressed and frustrated with his under achievements has put a stain on our relationship!
Let me explain. I can sit and study for an exam and pass it in no time with a score of 986/1000, ie only one mistake. I then go through periods of weeks when no information will sink into my brain, no matter how hard I concentrate. That leads to frustration in a wife when her expectations have been dashed over so many months.
I am also becoming increasingly paranoid and do not like to leave the house. I do no exercise and have lost interest in so many things, which were important to me. I have no friends as I shun relationships, and would not even accompany my wife to the Pub on New Years Eve. Instead, I will drink alone, not to get smashed, just enough to dull part of my brain. I will then stop drinking for weeks until something triggers me off such as ‘Saving Private Ryan, or the Falklands play the other night on TV.’
I left the marines after 22 years service but refused a ‘Top Table’ and leaving gift from the mess, it would have brought back too many painful memories. (I had been on every mess committee since achieving the rank of sergeant and live in the mess for almost three years, Ie it was my second home).
What I realise is that I am ‘f@#k Up Big style’! And, I don’t know why! I now think that ‘things’ which have happened in the past which lie buried in my sub-conscience have come home to haunt me. (Please excuse me as I am in tears as I write this to you all). I know that I am teetering on the brink and it’s a long and slippery slope and there will be no way back. I have been there - death holds no terror for me. The only thing holding me back is love for my family.
As to talking to some one I spoke to my elder brother yesterday, as I did aver the phone as I began my attempt at suicide. I did not tell him what I was up to at the time of cause, (it was only fate that saved me). However, he could tell that I was deeply upset over something and I eventually admitted some details the following day.
Incidentally my brother phoned me back late last night after talking to my sister and they came up with the solution that all this is my wife’s fault as she spends too much time with her mother etc, etc, etc. What I cannot get through to him (and the only other person I have confided in is out of the country on holiday) is that there is an underling cause to me being suicidal, its not my spouse (who is so supportive and best friend for 20 years). Problems in our relationship have are attributive to me withdrawing into myself and excluding everyone else, and due to my wife’s frustration in the emotional and physical changes in me as I have ‘battened down the hatches’ to subconsciously prepare me for an event which occurred two weeks ago.
I don’t have any big financial worries even after being unemployed for 18 month, my wife is a loving caring person as is my son, we are all in good health.
What put to you (may I call you friends) is that I believe something has acted as a trigger for all of this. Is it a coincidence that 20 years ago I was in the Falklands Conflict? I don’t know, but thanks just for being there and being supportive towards me.
I will seek medical help but not just yet, its going to bee a big step.
Thanks again,
Yours aye.
Thanks for help and support.
I have read what you have said and will seek medical help from my doctor before the week is out. My liver should be all right so long as I do not go on a prolonged drinking binge, it will heal itself. After my little tablet popping session I was in a bad way for attempted to void itself of what was effectively a poison. I had thought of that and tried to dilute the tablets by drinking lots of water. A build of stomach acids as aspirin etc dissolve the stomach lining (thus making it bleed) will cause some vomiting. That has probably saved my kidneys and liver, otherwise I faced 4-6 uncomfortable days in hospital with renal/liver failure. I know because I had a medical book at my side as I took the tablets! A textbook to make sure I was doing ‘as per the book’ and a suicide note to say goodbye.
I have talked to my brother and wife’s aunty about my attempt to take my own life, and I realise that I need to sit down and talk to my wife. Unfortunately, she has taking a break with her parents for 5 days and I am alone with our son. You may imagine living with someone who is essentially deeply depressed and frustrated with his under achievements has put a stain on our relationship!
Let me explain. I can sit and study for an exam and pass it in no time with a score of 986/1000, ie only one mistake. I then go through periods of weeks when no information will sink into my brain, no matter how hard I concentrate. That leads to frustration in a wife when her expectations have been dashed over so many months.
I am also becoming increasingly paranoid and do not like to leave the house. I do no exercise and have lost interest in so many things, which were important to me. I have no friends as I shun relationships, and would not even accompany my wife to the Pub on New Years Eve. Instead, I will drink alone, not to get smashed, just enough to dull part of my brain. I will then stop drinking for weeks until something triggers me off such as ‘Saving Private Ryan, or the Falklands play the other night on TV.’
I left the marines after 22 years service but refused a ‘Top Table’ and leaving gift from the mess, it would have brought back too many painful memories. (I had been on every mess committee since achieving the rank of sergeant and live in the mess for almost three years, Ie it was my second home).
What I realise is that I am ‘f@#k Up Big style’! And, I don’t know why! I now think that ‘things’ which have happened in the past which lie buried in my sub-conscience have come home to haunt me. (Please excuse me as I am in tears as I write this to you all). I know that I am teetering on the brink and it’s a long and slippery slope and there will be no way back. I have been there - death holds no terror for me. The only thing holding me back is love for my family.
As to talking to some one I spoke to my elder brother yesterday, as I did aver the phone as I began my attempt at suicide. I did not tell him what I was up to at the time of cause, (it was only fate that saved me). However, he could tell that I was deeply upset over something and I eventually admitted some details the following day.
Incidentally my brother phoned me back late last night after talking to my sister and they came up with the solution that all this is my wife’s fault as she spends too much time with her mother etc, etc, etc. What I cannot get through to him (and the only other person I have confided in is out of the country on holiday) is that there is an underling cause to me being suicidal, its not my spouse (who is so supportive and best friend for 20 years). Problems in our relationship have are attributive to me withdrawing into myself and excluding everyone else, and due to my wife’s frustration in the emotional and physical changes in me as I have ‘battened down the hatches’ to subconsciously prepare me for an event which occurred two weeks ago.
I don’t have any big financial worries even after being unemployed for 18 month, my wife is a loving caring person as is my son, we are all in good health.
What put to you (may I call you friends) is that I believe something has acted as a trigger for all of this. Is it a coincidence that 20 years ago I was in the Falklands Conflict? I don’t know, but thanks just for being there and being supportive towards me.
I will seek medical help but not just yet, its going to bee a big step.
Thanks again,
Yours aye.
