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PILES, HOW DO YOU CURE THEM?

General discussions on joining & training in the Royal Marines.
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Artist
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Post by Artist »

Tab

That idea is nearly as bad as one some bright spark where I live suggested.

Apply paint stripper to em! (he was serious!!)

There laying low at the moment, which suits me just fine. As long as I avoid spicy food and cider, mornings on the bog are bearable. :o :o

aye steve evans
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Tab
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Post by Tab »

Steve me ole lad, check with a doctor as it is one of the ways that they deal with piles, I don't know in this computer world if they still do it, but it was one of the ways they got rid of them.
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OVERALL ASSESMENT OF PEOPLE USING THIS SITE

Post by Artist »

I have been reading through the various suggestions for curing piles and have come up with these following insights into the people who visit and use this site;

1. Your all a bunch of sadists! :evil:

2. Your all a bunch of sadists! :evil:

3. Your all a bunch of sadists! :evil:

Yes. I think that covers it.

Aye Artist
harry hackedoff
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Post by harry hackedoff »

Ref Tab`s tubiflex post, "Please don`t try this at home" :P :P :P
You could, however, try home-cauterisation using an electric soldering iron :roll:
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Post by Tab »

Could always suckem and see what happens. Now there is vision

:angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel:
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Post by Artist »

The quack says "they have got to go!"

Clear lower deck friday with "grape remover". The grapes of wrath are looking good to go in the next few days! Sh**ing sideways again.

Family are brassed off with yours truely wingeing about them and have demanded the removal of the grapes of wrath ASAP. (uncareing bunch of sods)

Just don't like the thought of staying in Leighton Hospital. (one of the 10 worst hospitals in the country)

Aye Artist
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Post by John_D »

Good Luck Steve
Hope every thing goes ok.

Aye

John_D
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Post by Dmanton300 »

I haven't read a thread on any forum for along time that has made me weep tears, both of mirth and sympathy. Been there, done that. I think at one point I had one o 'dem strangulated jobs. . .it actually burst whilst I was having a Travis Tritt at the McDonalds in Bath back in 1991. Funny thing was there was no pain (actually it was a relief) but there was LOTS of blood, which was alarming to say the least. Walked around Bath for the rest of the day with toilet paper wedged up to avoid embarrasment. It's only when I think back now I shudder with horror at the potential there for infection. . I never saw anyone about it. Since then I've had one or two very minor piles pop up for a day or two to say hello and then dissapear again, but you live in dread that it's going to get worse. Baby wipes (or that bog roll with the aloe vera on it. . same thing really) are bloody excellent!
Best of luck with the op mate, no should have to put up with it if the misery I've been through with very minor ones is anything to go by. Just start worrying if the doc is doing an examination and places BOTH hands on your shoulders. . .
The latest and greatest is the new Buccaneer
All full of black boxes and Scimitar gear
But don't worry Kruschev, you're safe 'till the days
The F*****g great bastard is fitted with Speys!
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Post by sunman »

Friends told me my then future wife
had piles, then I found out it wasn't money.

Aye Sunman 8) .
I'm just 2 people short of a threesome.
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Post by Shoulderholster »

Ask to bring them home in a jar,then post a piccy so we can see what all the trouble was about.
But Steve for Christ sake don't get the jars mixed up with some of the gear from your new hobby!!.
SH
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Post by Archie »

Steve

Let us know how it goes.

If you are not totally happy with the outcome let us know. Rob can bring his restraining equipment up to Anglesey and I'll de-rust and sharpen my pussers jacknife. Then I'll whip 'em off for you in a trice, no pain guaranteed. I'll even throw a half price vasectomy into the bargain as I'll be in the area so to speak.


You don't need to thank me, it's what mates are for.
Archie.



"If there is a better way......find it!" (Thomas Alva Edison)
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Dmanton300
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Post by Dmanton300 »

Archie wrote:Steve

Then I'll whip 'em off for you in a trice, no pain guaranteed. .
Yeah. . for you! :D
The latest and greatest is the new Buccaneer
All full of black boxes and Scimitar gear
But don't worry Kruschev, you're safe 'till the days
The F*****g great bastard is fitted with Speys!
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Post by Archie »

Did I suggest otherwise? :lol:
Archie.



"If there is a better way......find it!" (Thomas Alva Edison)
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Post by Twenty One »

We can all laugh at the farmer giles guys,but seriously though, never ignore blood coming out the rear end no matter what, get it checked out as soon as you can. My Father-in-Law and Brother-in-Law ignored the signs and symptoms two years ago and both are now dead, died two weeks appart from the big C brother-in-law was 42 and an ex RAF painter.So don't ignore it. :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel:
Dissent Protects Democracy,Gezza Brek!
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