SaNdHuRsT

[doc_holliday]

yes well im not sure how i managed to get an A in english langage and a B in english litirature and am taking it for A level and predicted A/B, but obvouisly i should listen to you becuse you are the almightly military guru. an plus i can write when i want to an on these things i dont really need to, just to make sure grunts can understand it

Means bugger all. I got a C in English, but anyone looking at our respective use of English would think it was me who got the A and you who got the C.
I think a retarded, blindfolded hamster could get a GCSE in today's education system.
Oh, and if you really want the guys on here to help you, don't call them grunts - they don't tend to like that.

May I suggest "How to win friends and influence people" by Dale Carnegie? It has no pictures sadly, but it might help you in other areas...

[doc_holliday]

yes well im not sure how i managed to get an A in english langage and a B in english litirature and am taking it for A level and predicted A/B, but obvouisly i should listen to you becuse you are the almightly military guru. an plus i can write when i want to an on these things i dont really need to, just to make sure grunts can understand it

Far be it from me, a simple Grade C GCSE English bod (at second attempt I might add) to critique the work of an A grade student with A level potential but... (ahem)

"Yes well" - There should be a comma in there.
"im not sure" - Apostrophe shortage in your neck of the woods? Oh, and 'I' should be in upper case.
"english langage" - English being a proper noun should have an initial capital. And 'Language' has a 'u' in it.
"english litirature" - Literature? Oh, and see above for 'English'.
"obvouisly" - that would be 'obviously', obviously?
"almightly" - Another example of quick type?
"an" - You might pronounce it like that, but it is spelt 'and'. Also, being the beginning of a sentence, the 'a' should be uppercase.

But of course, you can write when you want to... (or should that be too or two?)

Sorry, could not resist and it kept me occupied for a few minutes. Don't use it and you lose it....

[Doc]

W_J_C your a twat now f@#k off and come back when you have some manners.
We would have all helped, encouraged and advised..............but sadly your one of the biggest hamster molesting twonks Ive ever had the mis-pleasure of reading about.
Next time you have a crap put your hand down the pan and introduce yourself to a superior species.

Translated

W_J_C ur a twt no f@#k of n cum bck when u av sum manners.

We wud av al elped, encouragde n advised...but ur 1 of the big hmster fiddling twonks Ive evr ad the misplaseure of rding abut.
Nxt time u have a crap, put ur hnd down the pan and say to a superioe speckies

[doc_holliday]

W_J_C your a twat no f@#k off and come back when you have some manners.
We would have all helped, encouraged and advised..............but sadly your one of the biggest hamster molesting twonks Ive ever had the mis-pleasure of reading about.
Next time you have a crap put your hand down the pan and introduce yourself to a superior species.

Christ Doc, (great name by the way!) you don't half mince about, beating around the bush. Don't sugar coat it man, tell him what you really think!!!!

[done-my-9]

Soon to be issued to all Chav Officers

[Doc]

Well he's an annoying little arse isn't he.

[doc_holliday]

Still laughing Doc, I can't see for tears! Would love to use that as a put down, but I think I would piss myself before I could finish the sentence!

Yes, he is annoying - I think he saw "Bad Lads Army" and thought it was the answer to all his prayers!

[Hostage_Negotiator]

Doc, you're in danger of requiring medical care yourself here, if you continue to sit on the fence in such a manner you'll get anal splinters! all the same nice one, it had to be said in words that the illiterate, opinionated, arrogant, supercillious little pr*ck could understand!!!!

[doc_holliday]

Well, as we sing at the Walkers Stadium "It's all gone quiet over there!"...

Anyone heard from Gnr Greengage lately?

[Hostage_Negotiator]

Nothing of late, maybe he's decided to stick to selling tent pegs and sas survival handbooks and is restricting his verbal immodium shortage to impressing the "fast women" down the local youth club!

[_W_J_C_]

Actuly i was at school but anyway how old are you guys?Im guessing over 18?So why dont you lot ever go down the pub to socialise?Or is this the only way you can make friends?Got an internet gf as well i supose but oh well its what I would expect. You lot really need to get out more i asked for a piece of simple advice and you lot decide to turn it into something, way to much time on your hands

[_W_J_C_]

neways im of now so c u guys around maybe when im an officer!an u lot are still on here tryin 2 give advise when all you do is moan, have a nice life on ur comp!

[Chappy]

Cheerio - Dont be a stranger now sweetheart.

[Doc]

W_J_C the people your slagging off are or have served in various units within the armed forces, They have LEFT school, have pubic hair and can spell. Theres probably a fair selection of medals worn by the people who have commentated on your activities on this website and these are the people who have DONE or are doing the things you currently dreaming about.

It has been suggested you alter your approach and then the stick would cease, but you have continued to speak out of your arse in an annoying and stuck up manner.

If you arent going to change your approach and accept that in service life if you cock up you get crap for doing so , then you have a lot to learn. In my day you would have been invited to inspect the side of a landrover.

You have brought this on yourself, have not learnt from it and continue to gob off like a spoilt spotty nosed twonk.

You could learn alot from here and have a laugh along the way, but it maybe a tad to late for it now.

My parting suggestion is as your shaking hands with the superior species in your toilet, you attach a piece of string to it and take it for a walk. Its the only way anything of substance is going to follow you anywhere.

Officer material my arse.

[Hostage_Negotiator]

cue: LOUD APPLAUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!