Chat up lines... that don't work!

m-a-s-s-e-y · Post by **m-a-s-s-e-y** » Sun 28 Mar, 2004 8:48 pm

your legs remind me of the eiffel tower,

all the attractions are at the top.

Frank S. · Post by **Frank S.** » Sun 28 Mar, 2004 9:00 pm

How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I'll put my head in.

Wholley · Post by **Wholley** » Mon 29 Mar, 2004 11:00 am

G'Day,Sheila.
Fancy a Fcuk?
No,mate.
Well,you wanna lay down while I have one?
Honest,I really heard that.Hobart,years ago.
Wholley.

Marina · Post by **Marina** » Mon 29 Mar, 2004 11:24 pm

No wonder the birds weren't impressed.

Wholley, I didn't know you were into French Connection fashion.

anglo-saxon · Post by **anglo-saxon** » Tue 30 Mar, 2004 12:55 am

Or, if she's a quadraplegic feminist..."Nice tits!"

HavocIRL · Post by **HavocIRL** » Tue 30 Mar, 2004 1:22 am

Say to her "dear diary, Jackpot!"

Dangerous Dave · Post by **Dangerous Dave** » Tue 30 Mar, 2004 8:24 am

Walk up to woman you don't know:

You say "Big, fat, hungry polar bear!"

Her "What???"

You say "Breaks the ice, doesn't it"

.......No?

Whitey · Post by **Whitey** » Tue 30 Mar, 2004 4:45 pm

What's yo name is girl?
I hear this on all the time around the school, broads around here are so stupid you really don't have to say anything.

Ploggers · Post by **Ploggers** » Tue 30 Mar, 2004 5:16 pm

Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken leg? No??? wanna go on a picnic?

Do you fancy a pizza and a f**k? [Slap] What's wrong, don't you like pizza?

Nice shoes! Can I try them on after we have sex?

Do wanna do a 68? "whats a 68?" you go down and I owe you one.

Walk up to girl in bar, sit next her, look into her eyes and say "well we can't f**k here!

Alright, let's go and have a shag... I'll give you a half hour.

Ahoy there fair maiden, might I trouble thee for a fisting?

harry hackedoff · Post by **harry hackedoff** » Tue 30 Mar, 2004 5:27 pm

Logs, with lines like that mate, I`m surprised you have time left to post here

They must be queueing up to get laid

"Any chance of a dance?"
"Piss off Royal"
"`Spose a fark is out of the question, then"

Ploggers · Post by **Ploggers** » Tue 30 Mar, 2004 5:35 pm

When I were a lad; myself and a mate used to go out on the town as you do.

Invariably I went after the talk slinky model types whilst Dave went after the fat ugly bird-ette. My success rate was between minimal and just above minimal whilst he was on 100%.

His theory; they're grateful, they say thank you and they buy me beer all night.

Hard to argue!

harry hackedoff · Post by **harry hackedoff** » Tue 30 Mar, 2004 6:25 pm

What are you saying mate?
Was Dave less choosy/ more successful or more successful/less choosy?
When all`s said and done, it`s a poor Marine who goes ashore, has two shags, and doesn`t give his Oppo one when he`s back onboard

Wholley · Post by **Wholley** » Tue 30 Mar, 2004 9:01 pm

Marina.
Just call me Popeye!
Sorry,guys,almost a one liner.
Wholley.

d4nny18 · Post by **d4nny18** » Fri 02 Apr, 2004 5:37 pm

your mate won't shag me will you?

i loove that 1

Skiffle · Post by **Skiffle** » Fri 02 Apr, 2004 8:35 pm

This face is laeving in five minute's....Be on it!

And i wonder why i'm on the flank with the plum rate's.

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