How to mount my very first gong.

[harry hackedoff]

Just logged on, shit-ers as usual and mis-read this thread as
How To Mount Your First GRONK
and thought it was advice intended for Nods on thier first run ashore

It isn`t, is it?

[Rogue Chef]

No it isn't, but it could be if we wanted it to be!

[Doc]

Well as the original post was about as interesting as watching a rather boring activity on national boring activity day....

Hows about we run some Trap a Gronk advice posts.

Mine is............

During the first LVs course to be run from leconsfield as oppossed to Poole, and your the only matelot amongst a load of Bootnecks, never ever goto a bar where there are a group of mingers asking everyone if they are Marines (our visit was much publicised in the local rag)

Failing step one, and you have just entered said bar, never ever trevor, when asked if you are a Bootneck (and your not) say yes, hoping a positive answer will empty your sack. Or if you are going to say yes, check your six first.

Failing all the above will result in being sent to the bar with a months wages and having the piss taken out of you for years from said peers.
Especially once my colleagues of the Admirals Regiment decided to correctly inform said gronk that I was infact a Matelot and she suitably thinned out.

Hope it helps......

The matelot is a mate btw, not me obviously , I heard the story once in thee eeerrr NAAFI, honest,

[harry hackedoff]

Hows about we run some Trap a Gronk advice posts

Sorry Jack, did you say something?
Trap, plums and door

[La Langosta]

I was infact a Matelot and she suitably thinned out.

Yes , well that gave the game away somewhat didnt it??
Even before you checked your 5 and 20's, you should have realised that you would never in a million years be mistook for anything other than a rum, bum and batty boy

[harry hackedoff]

Well, Myfanwy, I`ve got the looks, I`ve got the body so I thought, "Why not just go for it?"

Lozz, I wouldn`t mind but he doesn`t drink and he doesn`t smoke so there`s not much else left

[flighty]

Who told you that, Aitch?

He smokes like a beagle and drinks like a tart. Seen it!

As for the hair gel and the bristly tide mark round the bath, well ,really .......

Jayney x