Royal Marines has ruined my head

[GreyWing]

I wish I had never walked into that careers office,

about 4 years ago my mate was rejoining the marines, I'd heard of them but didn't know really what all the fuss was about.I went with him to the careers office and the guy started asking if I was up for it, and after a bit of banter I agreed to try it out, he basically said go as far as the prmc and see if you like it.

Fair enough, did the tests, got down to the prmc and had the sharpest shock to the system I'd ever had, couldn't walk for 3 days. Failed the prmc and was gutted, at first was relieved to be out of there and then once the pain had gone, I started to feel guilty, very gulity at failing something. Managed to get another crack at it, still didn't want to join but needed to pass the prmc, trained hard this time and passed 3 months later. Next thing I know, Career guys got me a entry date, wtf. Never said I was going to join, he just assumed since I wanted to do another prmc. The guy had been fantastic and didn't want to let him down, so said o.k, thought just do my 2 weeks and get my opt out, 3-4 weeks I'm out of there, Then everyone's happy.

Joined up and I must confess as the days went on, I loved it. I always hated leaving home as used to get homesick alot as a youngster and cry for mom. While I was there I never missed home once, gained about 40 brothers in the first 2 weeks.

After about 8 weeks, could see my motivation down there was not to fail a test, rather than the other guys who really wanted the green lid. At times I could see I was different from those boys, so decided to call it a day,

I've been out now for about 2 years, and at least once a week I get dreams about being in the marines, wanting to re-join. I even get dreams about being at lympstone and the section corporal telling me that I would have dreams about not being in the marines and being back home, a dream within a dream, Absolutley crazy. Don't get me wrong, there not nightmares just head bangers.

One of the worst things is, when you here on the tv that someones been killed, the guilt is something I've rarely felt, especially when on the odd occasion a royal loses there life, knowing you left early for whatever reason.

I wish I'd never been taken out of my boring civy box 4 years ago and glimpsed a the different world.

I imagine it's even worse for you guys that have been in years,

[james_m]

No plans to re-join then?

[GreyWing]

28 now, picked up a few injuries, that'd prevent me from getting back in, by chance was at football today and talking to another mate who was in for 4 years, he's been out 5 and says he gets the same feeling of wanting to got back every day.

He said it's like someone lending you a ferrari for a while and then giving you back the larda, I think he's got a point.

Not something that's anything near to throwing me off the edge, there was guys who had it a lot worse than me for leaving early. I saw a lot of guys whose family wouldn't have them back in the house for leaving early. At least 4 out of the 15 that left before me, were homeless, Very humbling to see.

On the other side, there are guys that have been in 10+ years and must have some bad issues with the political correct idiots that are in power.

Just wish I'd never seen the light, if only for those 8 weeks.

[james_m]

Very interesting story GreyWing - hope it all works out for you!

Cheers
James

[Rogue Chef]

Ahoy there!
I joined up in 1979 with a troop strength of 66. Only 18 passed out. A lot of the lads who opted where good guys and left for their own reasons. Our training team would tell us to try and persuade some of them to stay.
I've often wondered what happened to some of them and if they ever regretted leaving.

[GreyWing]

60 on our troop, now a comparatively big troop, as it was first one after the new year, about 12 originals passed out on troop, some being back trooped.

Must admit most the of the guys left because of own reasons, can't remember one pseron leaving from the workload, one left as he was a very young 16 year old and was binned and told to come back in a few years, boy he could take some punishment and still be happy, dirty recruit for 2 weeks straight and still happy as larry, we had an excellent training team, but heard some can be absolute hell raisers.

Training teams do a good job in most cases of getting people to stay, even got someones parent to come down to camp and have a word, mind you, the word was "don't bother coming back home"

About 8-9 on my troop were re-joins from previous troops after being out for a couple of years, and prmc's are full of possible re-joiners.

[Jonjo]

I left training at week 13 in march. Every day I think about what I was doing at Lympstone and it does my head in. Had to leave through injury. Theres nothing like the Royal Marines. Civvy street is shit.
Hopefully I will be able to rejoin eventually.

[chrisaryee]

Have you considered the Reserves? The training standard is the same but over 18 months so your injuries may not bother you too much. And the age limit is 33 i think.

[dwarfy]

Rings true here,

I left at week ten for different reasons, and ended up going to uni, thought about wishing i handn,t and wishing i was back there almost every day. But i,m actually quite glad i did leave now, even though it has been playing on my mind all these months. I had always planned on going back once i had finished uni, so i,m aiming to start the process after christmas as i finish my course in june.

I have had those same strange dreams, about being back in foundation mainly. I think when you,ve had a taste but left that taste never really leaves your mouth, and regardless of whatever else you eat it's not quite the same.

I,ve gone 3 years with thinking maybe i should have stayed, but i know for sure now that i wont go the rest of my life thinking like that.

I will be a re-join like many others. I,ve heard that nearly 50 per cent of those who opt out, end up going back. I actually wouldn,t be surprised.

dwarfy

[JoJo82]

I only did 5yrs in the RN and left in Feb 2004. I do miss it and regret leaving when i did, wish I did a few more years but I never regret my time serving. I loved it but I got what I had out of my time, I'd go back if I knew I'd love it as much as I use to.

Have you ever thought about joing another service instead of the RMs? Army or something?

[df2inaus]

Grey Wing,

I know its not the Marines, but I left Sandhurst around week 22. Regret leaving the Army but do not regret leaving officer training. Most of the guys in the same boat didn't commission either, it turned out.

Its true what you said, I was still the same guy 22 weeks in, meanwhile, the younger men were taking things to the next level and turning into very competent junior commanders.

I've found 4 years later that I did change a bit, it just never showed until after I left and only once in a while.

When it came to telling someone off, dealing with my dad's terminal illness, working calmly through a stressful situation or functioning perfectly well on a construction site in crap weather without complaining, it all began to make sense.

Now even the combat estimate and tactics make sense too.

I recommend you join the RMR. I'm sure your previous experience will help you.

df2inaus

[Jim T]

52 of us (278 Troop) arrived on the platform of CTCRM on 21st July 1981. Of that 52 only 12 passed out on 19th March 1982.

I spent 9 years in the Corps, and have now been out for 16 years. Not a day (or night) goes by without me thinking or remembering my time, both good and bad.

Funny.....the longer it is since I left the Corps, the more I feel a Royal Marine.

[bean]

I know what you mean Jim, always felt like it even when I came out. Its funny how it effect you. I was down at the RM Museum the other day wandering around and got to think what I would say if some one asked me if I had seen anyone ( in the photo ect) I recognized. The answer was right there in my head, I recognized myself in every single one, not by looks, thought I still have the tash and short hair, but just by the way they stood, stared back from the photos, you could feel the attitude, I am a bootneck you can,t crack me theres my tuppence of madness .

[Jim T]

Bean....I still have the short hair mate, but have been forced to loose the tash by my wife and daughters. They kept saying that I looked like a ginger haired Freddy Mercury!

Now get asked for ID everytime I go for a pint (I wish!) LOL

[bean]

Now thats mean of them Jim even the mannequins in the Museum have been allowed to keep there tashes.