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HELP WANTED - Military Coup d'etat

Posted: Thu 28 Dec, 2006 9:41 pm
by Chateau Lafite
Gentlemen. It is with a heavy heart, and a deep sense of PATRIOTIC DUTY, that I am forced to confirm the rumours. Yes, I am organising a coup d’état.

Tony bLiar has gone too far. It has got to stop AND I CAN’T CONTROL MY RAGE ANY LONGER…

JOIN ME! Surely there are enough military personnel here to make it a swinging (at least for Tony) success!

In short the main objectives are;

1) Removal of the Government. In chains.
2) Three-day pre-execution public flogging for bLiar. A week for his wife.
3) Seizure of the main methods of production, both industrial and financial. Assets will return to the Proletariat (minus a small handling charge).
4) The setting up of hard labour camps (in former Army barracks) for all
a. Chavs
b. Labour members
c. Solicitors
(Squaddies from those camps will move to Dorneywood – John Prescott’s former Grace and favour mansion)
5) Nationalisation of all wine merchants and seizure of all fine burgundy

I’m especially hoping that people on this site might know where I can lay my hands on:
1) 20,000, or so, troops (must have own gun)
2) 350 Artillery Pieces (105 or bigger)
3) 200 Tanks (pref. T72 or better)
4) The email address of that Thai General.

The Coup is pencilled in for next Thursday (weather permitting).

After the Coup, there will be a full and free election. Sadly at this stage I am the only candidate, but if the country wishes for me to lead them it is my humble duty to do so. Applications are currently being sought for other Ministerial positions; contact Mfat-Man for an application form, with a brief outline of your policies.

Onward…TO THE REVOLUTION…

Posted: Thu 28 Dec, 2006 9:43 pm
by jamie534
:lol: I'll have some of that.

Re: HELP WANTED - Military Coup d'etat

Posted: Thu 28 Dec, 2006 10:14 pm
by pablo
Chateau Lafite wrote: 4) The email address of that Thai General.
Sonthi? He's in my weekly Yahoo poker club. Bad loser. I'll pass his addy on forthwith.

Viva la revolution!

Re: HELP WANTED - Military Coup d'etat

Posted: Thu 28 Dec, 2006 11:22 pm
by mfat_man
Chateau Lafite wrote:Gentlemen. It is with a heavy heart, and a deep sense of PATRIOTIC DUTY, that I am forced to confirm the rumours. Yes, I am organising a coup d’état.

Tony bLiar has gone too far. It has got to stop AND I CAN’T CONTROL MY RAGE ANY LONGER…

JOIN ME! Surely there are enough military personnel here to make it a swinging (at least for Tony) success!

In short the main objectives are;

1) Removal of the Government. In chains.
2) Three-day pre-execution public flogging for bLiar. A week for his wife.
3) Seizure of the main methods of production, both industrial and financial. Assets will return to the Proletariat (minus a small handling charge).
4) The setting up of hard labour camps (in former Army barracks) for all
a. Chavs
b. Labour members
c. Solicitors
(Squaddies from those camps will move to Dorneywood – John Prescott’s former Grace and favour mansion)
5) Nationalisation of all wine merchants and seizure of all fine burgundy

I’m especially hoping that people on this site might know where I can lay my hands on:
1) 20,000, or so, troops (must have own gun)
2) 350 Artillery Pieces (105 or bigger)
3) 200 Tanks (pref. T72 or better)
4) The email address of that Thai General.

The Coup is pencilled in for next Thursday (weather permitting).

After the Coup, there will be a full and free election. Sadly at this stage I am the only candidate, but if the country wishes for me to lead them it is my humble duty to do so. Applications are currently being sought for other Ministerial positions; contact Mfat-Man for an application form, with a brief outline of your policies.

Onward…TO THE REVOLUTION…
CL

That's the best manifesto I have seen for a while :wink:

Chavs in irons, about bloody time!

Posted: Fri 29 Dec, 2006 12:22 am
by Stinky
I am in.
The other day I cycled past a chav, I didn't hear what he said first time because of my music but I heard 'fall off mate'. He was about 13 with two smaller girls. I told him to fark off to which I recived the names of wa*ker and c*nt. I hope they burn in hell some time soon.

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 9:29 am
by CptStabbo
Morning CL,

Can we not postpone until a week Wednesday? It's block leave you see and then it takes a week to get the stores together as you know.

See you there (i'll be the one throwing flaming white dog turds).

Regards,

CS

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 9:34 am
by Chateau Lafite
Hello Capytain!

Week wednesday is fine. I was having trouble with the explosives anyway to be honest, and was 19,832 troops short as well (the youth of today - no backbone. In my day we had a revolution every tuesday like clockwork. I blame the playstations.)

Can you get your hands on some tanks?

Regards

CL

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 10:56 am
by CptStabbo
Mon-senior Lafite,

Your wish is my command, I have commandeered the remote controlled Panzer bought for my Nephew's Christmas pressie and know the wherabouts of at least two T62 hulks in deepest darkest Wales that just need a cosmetic facelift. One is painted partially orange though.

I can also offer a further 3 'operational tanks' - one hot-water and two goldfish.

Speak soon,

CS

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 12:17 pm
by E5_Man
My dad owns a pet shop and has 50 x210 tanks in stock. Would u like filters with them :P , im sure he can slip you a couple free tropical fish.

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 12:45 pm
by AJtothemax
I'll pop down to argos and get as many guns as i can, and don't worry, i'll make sure i buy a decent brand - super soakers! :P

Not even superman can ake on a super soaker, let alone a challenger 2! Smashy smashy! :lol:

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 3:16 pm
by Paratrooper01
Everyone up for wearing power ranger outfits for disguise? :)

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 3:21 pm
by E5_Man
cant i wear my balaclava, its my religion, cause it stops women wanting to rape me :x :x

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 4:25 pm
by AJtothemax
Well, i dont think theres ever been a 'all natural' uniform ey?! As long as my troop is full of talent then i'll be more than happy to show them how to use a super soaker! :lol:

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 8:43 pm
by Stinky

Posted: Fri 05 Jan, 2007 9:53 pm
by SO19