Why is it.........?

[Rotary Booty]

Why is it......
...that it now takes me all night, to do what I used to do all night?

...that Grecian 2000 tastes awful, and doesn't work?

...that when I go to an 'Exclusive Sale' there's loads of other people there?

...the hand-rail on an escalator goes faster than the stairs?

...there's only one Monopolies Commission?

...people who haven't eaten for a week go to the cinema, and not a cafe?

...people with a cough go to the theatre, and not a doctor?

....when they play 'non-stop hits' on the radio they keep stopping them to tell you they're playing non-stop hits

I'm sure you can think of more.......!!!

[Yorkie Malone]

Why?? That people never use indicators at roundabouts, or when changing lanes, but they are standard issue on all cars??

Why?? do people have front fog lights on when it's a nice clear night

But

They don't have any lights on when it's raining or misty in the day??

[Jim T]

Because THEY know it p****s you off Yorkie!!!

Jim T

[Yorkie Malone]

And they wonder why they get hit with all 18 wheels, and 30 odd tonne of things land on thier heads.

SyY

[Mutley]

Why do cyclists ignore all traffic signals.

Why do cyclists ignore all signals given by other road users.

Why do drivers indicate right and then pull over to the left before turning right, taking up more room than a Sherman tank.

Why do cyclists go all the way round the outer lane of a roundabout, without any indication, when they want to take the last exit.

Why do cyclists believe that all road users and pedestrians will second guess the intentions of a haphazardly weaving bicycle.

Why is the presence of any vehicle I am driving, and any directional signals given totally invisible to most other road users.

Why do cyclists believe they have immunity from harm when weaving through traffic.

Why do cyclists believe every pedestrian should jump out of their way when on the pavement.

Why do police ignore all traffic offences committed by cyclists

And finally........
Why do drivers on the 'school run' park in the most dangerous possible place.

[Yorkie Malone]

that the first person asleep always snores

[Rotary Booty]

Why is it .........

That when we ride our bikes in Mutley's town he tries to run us down!! From: Police Constables Luke Wright, Luke Left and Luke Wright-Again

that you never see any baby pigeons?

that Supermarket trollies never go in a straight line?

that 'The Car in Front' isn't a Toyota, it's a Volvo 340SE going at 20mph in a 50 mph zone?

that I always Push doors marked Pull?

that they use 'Push' and 'Pull' on doors
when they both begin with PU and are of 4 letters?

that if you park your car on double yellow lines you're 'obstructing the free flow of traffic' but if you put a disabled sticker on the dashboard, you're not?

[Jim T]

Why is it truck drivers

Always pull out without indicating?

Drive 2 feet off your bumper at 75 Mph, even though they complain about their wagons being speed restricted?

Spend 3 hours blocking lane 2 of the M way to overtake a truck in lane 1, and then immediately pull into the next service station?

Are always drinking a cup off coffee in one hand whilst chatting on a CB with the other?

Keep jackknifing their trucks and blocking the f*****g M way for hours when they are 'professional drivers'?

Always drip that they are victimised by the Police?

Jim T

PS Sorry Yorkie, bad day on the M way!!!!

[Yorkie Malone]

Why is it that

When driving through the road works with a 40 or 50 mph speed limit you always end up with a queue of cars behind you?

When as a lorry driver you, indicate to pull out but the car driver always stays in the middle lane, and will not let you out, when the outside lane is empty?

That at exits off the dual carrigeway or motorway the car driver shoots in front of the lorry at the last minute causing the lorry driver, who had left enough space to pull up, to skid and possibly jack-knife?

Car passengers always come past the lorries with the road atlas open on thier knees, but are then seen to be reversing down the hard shoulder cos they have missed thier turning?

Jim I always have a nice day on the roads, as it is a travelog opening up in front of me. Not a race to get to the end of the world as quickly as possible.

SyY

[John_D]

Why is it a tacho chart never backs up your story ?

Why is it that the fifth wheel can,t be used as a spare ?

Why is it a lorry driver has a dead man in his cab ?

John_D

[Rotary Booty]

Why is it:

when you find what you are looking for, it is always in the last place you look?

Oxford and Cambridge are always in the final of the Boat Race?

they don't make a 99p coin?

[Yorkie Malone]

Why is it that

There are always pubs called The Halfway House but never The Quarterway, The Three Quarterway, The Nearly There, The OOps Youv'e Passed It,

Also why is it that when you knock on the door of the pub at 0600 hrs and ask for a pint the landlord gets upset. But the sign outside says Open ALL day

SyY

[El Prez]

That the heat of the meat and the angle of dangle may be constant but the gravitational pull of Venus opposed by Uranus is irreversible?

Why is it that when I rode a huge red 1500cc GoldWing none of the pricks driving on four wheels could see me, yet every speed cop between Truro and Chester could spot me a mile away. (devastated to be pulled over by two girly cops one day for undertaking them; they were in a diesel escort)

Why is it that now I can't ride a bike anymore I'm terrified of hitting one?

Why is it that Derek Blevins remembers what we did in March '77, but I can't remember if I went to Tescos yesterday.

Dear Mum ................ your loving son ???[/i]