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S.H.One.T Bags

General discussions on joining & training in the British Army.

S.H.One.T Bags

Poll ended at Thu 13 Apr, 2006 7:07 pm

Tesco's ziplock (double bagged)
3
50%
Black Doggie Do numbers (fit for purpose but big)
1
17%
Clingfilm it
2
33%
 
Total votes: 6

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Chateau Lafite
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S.H.One.T Bags

#1 Post by Chateau Lafite » Thu 30 Mar, 2006 7:07 pm

After a nasty experience I'm keen to know what's hot and what's not in the portable do-do department.

Advertise your company or services here and contact us today!

adj125
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#2 Post by adj125 » Thu 30 Mar, 2006 7:39 pm

i use these double baged of course



Image

Avaliable from here

http://www.sofmilitary.co.uk/military/select.asp

and then put contents in to one of the black plastic tubes trip flares come in
Ex RE 1986 till 1997

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#3 Post by Cliodna » Thu 30 Mar, 2006 11:45 pm

Sorry can't answer right now....too busy pishing myself laughing :lol: :lol: :lol:

hc00
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#4 Post by hc00 » Fri 31 Mar, 2006 7:10 am

??

Im guessing this is about picking up dog cr*p as its illegal to leave it but why is it in the special forces section?
Wo zhu ni jian kang.

Chateau Lafite
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#5 Post by Chateau Lafite » Fri 31 Mar, 2006 10:00 am

Ah no Mr Double Zero you misunderstand.

It's in this section because it is SOP to take it with you. Choice of piss bottles and Sh1t bags is fairly important if you don't want your bergan to have its own special stains and aroma.

adj125
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#6 Post by adj125 » Fri 31 Mar, 2006 10:46 am

Another solution is to use another patrol members bergan to carry your c**p
Ex RE 1986 till 1997

Chateau Lafite
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#7 Post by Chateau Lafite » Fri 31 Mar, 2006 9:54 pm

adj125 wrote; "and then put contents in to one of the black plastic tubes trip flares come in".

Good tip, but does this mean that you have to set off a flare every time you take a crap?

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#8 Post by Spooky » Fri 31 Mar, 2006 10:52 pm

Chateau Lafite wrote:Ah no Mr Double Zero you misunderstand.

It's in this section because it is SOP to take it with you. Choice of piss bottles and Sh1t bags is fairly important if you don't want your bergan to have its own special stains and aroma.
Would that not ward off predators and people muscling in on your territory!? :lol:
SP

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#9 Post by Jimmy » Sat 01 Apr, 2006 2:00 pm

OK, might not be the right thing, but it should make you laugh, when I was a young cop working in Bo'ness, I was paired with a guy who could not let anything go, we were on mobile patrol when he saw this dog with its owner doing its business on the pavement.

The good chap that my partner for the day was asked the dog owner to pick up the mess and bin it, thinking the owner would have a dog dirt bag.

The owner didnt infact have such a bag and after some time arguing my esteemed colleague decided to charge the dog owner with the offence, however on seeing that my colleague was really going to charge him the owner picked up the mess in his bare hand and put it in his pocket saying, there you go happy now?

I was rather embarresed :oops:

Makes a funny story though :lol:
Whit are you aw aboot?

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#10 Post by Jimmy » Sat 01 Apr, 2006 2:03 pm

Jimmy wrote: saw this dog with its owner doing its business on the pavement.
The dog was sh1tting, not the owner, just to clarify
Whit are you aw aboot?

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#11 Post by SO19 » Sat 01 Apr, 2006 4:01 pm

I would have loved to have seen that one Jimmy. :lol:
[i]‘We are not interested in the possibilities of defeat’ - Queen Victoria, 1899[/i]

Doc

#12 Post by Doc » Sun 02 Apr, 2006 2:55 pm

The day before we left for Iraq, I was in my grot checking my kit when the lad I shared the room with comes in flapping like a flappy thing. He had just joined the unit, drafted in from the Navy to fill the gaps in medic land, and didnt have much of a clue when it came to things green.

Anyway being the good egg I am I helped sort out his kit and pack his bergen etc. 1800hrs I slope off for a shower and matey shouts out hes going to the bar for a few wets. (we had been on standby/hurry up/wait drills for 10 days so everyone was under the impression that we wouldnt be going anytime soon)

So I dhobi and get back to the room, telly on , kettle on, fag in gob.

Gets my head down a few hours later. Next thing Im being gently shaken by baby medic. Asking me how to pack a bergen?? I informed him that it was done. He informed me that he had unpacked it all as he couldnt find his toothbrush!!!!!

As he went to clean his teeth and seeings that helping out would be the quicker option to get back to sleepybyes, I settled down to sort his rig out.

Just then the desire to shit came upon me so off I went. Being the evil git I am I took some clingfilm with me. Gave birth and wrapped it up. Got back to room and placed the brown serpent in the bottom of the lads bergen.

Next day we rushed up to South Cerney, then to Lyneham, then to the middle east.

First night in country in barracks, matey opens his bergen and all around him faint :lol: :lol: clingfilm wasnt strong enough and the smell of poo wofted through the cool arabian night.

Laugh I nearly choked :lol: :lol: :lol:

Until opening my bergen and finding a breezeblock under the top flap :evil: :lol:

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#13 Post by CptStabbo » Mon 03 Apr, 2006 9:53 am

It's good to see that this post has stirred up some interest in an otherwise listless forum.

I'd like to add my two penneth if i may.

It is a rare man indeed who is able to contort his body in such a way as to curl one out in a zip lock bag in a sub-surface OP admin area.

It is at times like these you learn to use the two pronged method of one of your oppos gently laying the cling film out 'neath your raised backside a la Delia Smith lining a tin in preparation for a pineapple upside down cake, and letting one go onto this.

Said stool can then be safely rolled, twisted and moulded into a humorous shape before being safely double bagged in zip lock.

Thank you for your time.

CS

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#14 Post by SO19 » Mon 03 Apr, 2006 12:35 pm

What happen's though when the luxary of a rather elogant upside down cake is denied oneself and a rather hasty and somewhat messy mud pie takes its place, regardless if you want to bake it or not ?
[i]‘We are not interested in the possibilities of defeat’ - Queen Victoria, 1899[/i]

Artist

#15 Post by Artist » Mon 03 Apr, 2006 1:36 pm

Bloke in Norge one night decided to move into the trees to have a dump.

Strained and did his thing. He looked down to check his Shit was OK. Negative shit!! :o

I'd got bored and followed him into the trees with a snow shovel. Poor bugger had deposited his Dump on the said shovel. He was a tad concerned for a couple of hours until he found it all nicely wrapped up in a binliner tucked away in the bottom of his Slug.

Bad enough asking if Bears shit in the woods let alone Bootnecks!! :D

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