Share this page:

New terror weapons confiscated at JFK Airport

Interested or active in politics, discuss here.
Post Reply
User avatar
Rising Star Member
Rising Star Member
Posts: 445
Joined: Sun 14 Sep, 2003 2:29 am
Location: Toronto

New terror weapons confiscated at JFK Airport

#1 Post by df2inaus »

Don't know where this originated, but it's a gem :lol: !
At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.

At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction. "Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," Ashcroft said. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like "x" and "y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. "As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides to every triangle,"
Ashcroft declared.

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes. "I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to disintegrate us with calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love to inflict plane on every sphere of influence," the President said, adding: "Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root, make our point, and draw the line." President Bush warned, "These weapons of math instruction have the potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never before seen unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to factor-in random facts of vertex."
"Poor Ike, it won't be a bit like the Army. He'll find it very frustrating. He'll sit here and he'll say, 'Do this! Do that!' And nothing will happen."
Harry Truman

Advertise your company or services here and contact us today!


#2 Post by Wholley »

Nice one dfinaus,
That really is a gem!
:D :D :D

Cult Member
Cult Member
Posts: 1911
Joined: Sun 11 Aug, 2002 4:11 pm
Location: Runcorn

#3 Post by Sisyphus »

Hoorah, df2 :laola:

I luv's it!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Mind you there's always a kernel of truth in these things, after all algebra was invented by Al Jabr - an arab! :-?

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest