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You know you've had too many when...........

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Cronkilla
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You know you've had too many when...........

Post by Cronkilla »

Everybody reaches the point (of course you dont realise till the next day) when they have had too many.
Drawing on some past experiences i should of stopped when:

I started chasing some swans for a hug.
Was slapped by a girl for no apparent reason(still no idea why).
Handcuffed myself to an ordinary door handle while shouting for help before a girl to simply slid my hand off the handle.

Something i always seem to do is make some sort of cocktail, usually involving some weird ingredients with stupid amounts of spirits :drinking:
Wholley
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Post by Wholley »

Cronk.
I always know by 05.00hrs that Iv'e inbibed to much,it's an automatic alarm system known as"She Who Must Be Obeyed"The glare on her face tells me all I need to know,and that I'm in the deep stuff for at least a week,unless a new car is forthcoming,or jewels or chocolates.
If none of the above transpires then I may as well forget my quiet life for at least a month.One thing that doe's bug me though,I never remember the point where I allegedly called her a"Fat Cow"or"Whinging Bitch"However,when she calls me a"Fat Lazy Bastard"or"As much good as a jello teapot"I don't expect a new car or jewels or chocolates.
Ho-Hum.
Wholley.
:o
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BenChug
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Post by BenChug »

Haha wholley, we are two men of the same life :P

Said experience has happened to me all too many times.

Nothing worse than your slight off hand comment, "stupid bitch," that has you thinking about eating a bar of soap over the next few weeks.

You know you have had more than you need when you wake up in the drunk tank and have no idea where you are. Personnal favorite though is this one ruck i got into in some pub, got taken to the hospital, woke up wandered home. Had no recollection of any of the previous nights events ever transpiring, just woke up to the lady screaming "what the f@#k happened to your face!" My mates left me in the dark on that one for awhile.
If a man has nothing he is willing to die for then he isn't fit to live.
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Post by kwew »

You know you've had too many when...........
Your standing in front of your chest of drawers having a whizz, believing its the tiolet. The above wasnt me I would like to add, I dont drink but Id say that is a good marker to stop at.
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goreD.
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Post by goreD. »

You know you've had too many when....

All you can remember from the night before is up to the point were you bet your mate 10 quid you could climb the disco walls using only your lips.....

Doh.

Gore.
Mexican bandit, "Badges?! We don't need no stinking badges....."
Major Kong, "Shoot, a fella could have a pretty good weekend in vegas with all that stuff....."
Gore, "The first casualty of war is your underpants....."
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BenChug
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Post by BenChug »

You know you've had to many when the last thing you remeber is your hands on a whale of a womans hips.

Then the morning after where you naw your arm off and attempt some SERE.
If a man has nothing he is willing to die for then he isn't fit to live.
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minimac
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Post by minimac »

kwew wrote:The above wasnt me I would like to add, I dont drink but Id say that is a good marker to stop at.
*coughs* bollox *coughs*

:lol: :oops: :lol: #

MM
kwew
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Post by kwew »

Honestly, Im water total, havent had even a dash of alcohol for 4 and a half years now and even then it was only a glass of wine over a meal. But one of my friends is an actual alcoholic (he goes to counciling and group sessions) Ive seen a fair amount of drunken behaviour. Thats not to say I dont like to go out and have fun, I love going out when my mates get hammered it means I can make them do stupid things ( nothing sexual before any of you dirty sods say anything :D )
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Post by Frank S. »

You know you've had too many when it's all coming out at both ends and death doesn't seem so bad.
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mercury
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Post by mercury »

You know you've had too much when you use your id card to force the lock into your mates room when he's on leave so you can steal his porn collection


Or

You know you've had to much when upon realising you've lost your room key , the only one in the block that can't be opened with an id card, you climb up onto the roof of the building , climb across onto your window sill , open the top light of your window and climb through dangling by the legs and narrowly missing breaking both


happy singley days

:-?
"certa cito"
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Post by Seb »

You kno when youve had too much when u slap a fat womans arse and u fall over when shes chasing you...

been there and its not pretty.....
Seb
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Post by lew »

You know when you’ve had to much when you decide running 5 miles home to your mates house after a kebab, wearing only your boxers shirt and shoes in the rain is a great idea...

You know when you've had to much when you all dress up as terrorists using old T-shirts, and burst into someone’s room, tip the beds and steal their beer :roll: ...

When you wake up to a fat slag, when you went to bed with a babe :-? :lol:


You know when you had to much when you throw up through your nose and not your mouth, then drink it again because your mates "double" dare you to 8) ...


lew
All I want in life is a cold beer, a fast car, a big F**King gun and a hot woman to fetch the beer, and clean the car! is that really to much to ask? - Quotes by a redneck.com

recruit test 21 march - PASSED
medical 30 march - PASSED
interview 30 march - PASSED
PJFT - 11 april - PASSED 9:18
PRMC - 7th - 10th JUNE. PASSED
foundation - 29th August
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goreD.
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Post by goreD. »

You know when you’ve had to many when you wake up next morning hand-cuffed to a Gorilla in the cargo hold of a 747 bound for Jakarta.

BUGGER.
Inform the British Embassy please.

Gore.
Mexican bandit, "Badges?! We don't need no stinking badges....."
Major Kong, "Shoot, a fella could have a pretty good weekend in vegas with all that stuff....."
Gore, "The first casualty of war is your underpants....."
Wholley
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Post by Wholley »

Jeezis Gore.
First it's a bunny,then a beagle now a gorilla.
I think you should consider therapy
Wholley.
:P :P
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